"How are you coping with a recovering Mater, a new baby, three other Avocado Juniors under the age of 7, and the Dreaded Sunday?" You'd think Pater would be asked this more often, but his experience to date has consisted of some form of, "How's Mater doing?"
Are people scared that if they draw attention to Pater's superhero skills in single handedly juggling so many energy-packed, fun-demanding, attention-seeking Avocado Juniors, that he might get big headed or even ask for a bonus at the end of the year? Has Mater instructed everyone to avoid asking any questions whose answers might draw attention away from the trials and tribulations of her child birth and post partum recovery? Did Mater's girlfriends, who so kindly organised our meals for the first two weeks after AJ4 was born, also send out a sisterhood mass email instructing all and sundry against asking deep and philosophical questions such as, "How are you, Pater?", for fear that the answer might set a concern-about-Pater-precedent that their husbands would learn from?
Well to answer those unasked questions, Pater is doing fine. In fact he would go as far as to say, he's doing good. Berry, good - thanks to Farmer Whittamore. Where else can a Pater take his 3 rambunctious Avocado Juniors to use up energy while doing manual labour and all under the pretense of "fun"? And despite the un-fenced area allowing AJ3 free reign to theoretically run amok and causing Pater never ending anxiety that he would do just that, fun was had by all (whether picking, eating or just throwing straw)...
...so much so, that we went back the following week, this time for raspberries because a) AJ1 wanted to prove she's the World Champion of All Berry Picking following her stunning results in the earlier strawberry round; b) AJ2 refused to bend down to pick berries ever again because, well, he's a lazy bum; c) AJ3 figured that whereas in the strawberry patch he had zero chance of running away without Pater seeing him, the higher raspberry bushes suggested sufficient cover to plan his escape (not to mention he was banned from the strawberry patch for committing Straw and Strawberry Havoc); and d) Pater wanted to get out of the house before Mater found another post partum, completely logical, not at all crazy, chore for him to do...
The berries were tasty, the picking was fun (it helped that we got there at 5.30am - Hasses before Masses), and the Avocado Juniors enjoyed having their Pater to themselves. Pater was just happy that both times he got home with the same three kids he left with. Roll on pumpkin season in the Fall!
We are celebrating a most auspicious date, AJ4 - you've survived Month #1 in the Hass Avocado household. Happy Birthday! Mater can't help wondering what was going through your mind over that first month. The obvious answer is not much, since you're asleep most of the time...
But let's assume for a minute that more is passing through your cute little brain than "eat, poo, sleep". Mater doesn't want to sound like some crazy mother, projecting her own agenda, thoughts and hopes onto a new born baby, but if she were, it would be a safe bet that they would sound something like this:
- "I love Source of Food. Life is just so great when she's around, whether it's to hold me, talk to me, feed me, bathe me, sing to me (wow, does she have a great voice) or just make me feel so secure. She's the best!"
2) "What's the story with Loud Voice? Every time he gets close to me, my ears hurt and he uses me as a sleeping aid!"
- "And what's with all his artistic photoshoots already!!!!"
- "I'm not sure yet what to make of the Small People. Individually they seem okay...
...but I'm confused as to what happens when they are put together. Sometimes it works...
...and then sometimes, well, not so much."
- "After 1 month, I think I can safely say that Source of Food, Loud Voice and the Small People are all happy to have me in the family...
...but I'd sleep a
lot easier if one of the Small People was a
lot less eager to see, touch, feel and sometimes bite me!"
- "Yup, after Month #1, it's safe to say that I'm very happy being a part of the Avocado Hasses. Excuse me, while I ponder over what to expect in Month #2."
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