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Pater: Nothing to fear
Posted by Pater , Tuesday, May 24, 2016 5:05 PM
Here's the first piece of knowledge: meditation leads to calmness. Judging on the punch Pater just felt against Mater's stomach it seems like you don't want to spend your last month in the womb achieving nirvana through yoga. Hmmm, how about trying food? It seems to calm the Avocado Hasses et famille instantly. Preparing it. Eating it. At all times. In all places. Namaste.
Many people find the garden relaxing. No, not playing in it. Working in it. Hard.
Mater has suggested that perhaps you might also want to have fun in the garden. Whatever. Pater supposes you'll want protection while you're out there too? Kids of today!
Since we've veered into the virtues of exercise, you should be aware that it's not just our garden where you can run, slide, jump, skip, scooter, climb or bounce.
Worried about being outside in a country that is frozen for 75% of the year? Not a problem. We can do "indoors" and even "water indoors" any time you want.
Okay, okay, Pater will 'fess up; a few homework photos were snuck in. Sorry kid, but sometimes you will be expected to put pen to paper and your nose in a book. Especially the latter. But don't worry, there'll be lots of people to help you with the bigger words.
Here's another well known piece of knowledge that should put your mind to rest about becoming a Hass Avocado - if everything is awesome when you're part of a team, it's funkadelic, splendiforous and kryptonian when you're playing Lego!!!!
It sounds very busy, right? Pater certainly feels that way sometimes...most of the time... all of the time. But worry not. When life gets too cray cray, then just chill out. With or without a blanket.
You're probably now wondering if you're going to be bored. A tea break can only last so long. Siestas need to finish. Otherwise your mind can turn to mush. What's the solution? Sudoko? Candy Crush? How about helping us work out what the following means for AJ2's future?
Flummoxed? Worry not - we can't figure it out either. Don't fret. Life is just too confusing to get bogged down in these unsolveable enigmas. Don't worry, be happy!
And if that doesn't work, just do something craaaazzzzyyyyyy!!!!
Still worried? Seriously? How much more convincing do you need, AJ4? You have three beautiful, wonderful, funny siblings all waiting to play with you. Yes, yes, Pater knows: Mater's womb wall is not so thick that you can't hear the arguing, fighting and crying that goes on between them. But can you also hear the laughter, friendship and love between them?
Look, let's get down to brass tack: if it doesn't work out with your siblings, you can always move in with some lovely ladies who, according to those in the know, will shower you with pure, unadulterated love (candies and toys), 24/7/52. And all they expect back are the occasional kisses and hugs. It's a great deal.
Mater informs me that, while those ladies may be lovely, apparently you can't go and live with them; that Pater has been waffling on for far too long; and that you have nothing to fear, we love you lots and can't wait to have you as part of our family.
Really? That's all its taken to calm you down? Okay, great. So I guess we'll be seeing you next month then. Oh and with everyone in the delivery room wearing surgical masks and fashionable hair nets, you may be worrying that you won't know which one is your Pater. That's easy. I'll be the chilled-out, worry-free guy with a big smile on his face.
Posted in
AJ4,
building,
climbing,
eating,
garden,
girlfriend,
grandparents,
hugs,
ice cream,
jumping,
karate,
Lego,
painting,
Pater,
reading,
scooter,
sleeping,
swimming,
uncles,
writing
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