Hasses aren't only avocados.

Avocado Jnr: New home

Posted by Mater , Sunday, December 26, 2010 10:52 AM

Mater and Pater (whatever those titles mean!) have been remiss in writing a blogpost for ages so it falls to me, Avocado Jnr, to tell you all about my new home. Writing this post is not easy, I can tell you. I had to hide Pater's notebook in my diaper earlier and smuggle it into my cot when Mater took me for my afternoon nap. Typing away quietly so that my monitor doesn't pick up the noise is not an easy task. And if I'm cranky later, blame it on my parents for neglecting their blogging obligations.

Okay, down to the task at hand. Please allow me (and doggy) to start by welcoming you to my new house.

It's been so long since the last post that I should mention how I'm now walking, have two bottom teeth and have added a few words to my vocabulary. Oh and I can touch type 100 words a minute. Okay, now that you're caught up, let's begin our tour. We start in my family room, move into my kitchen and then into my dining room.

So this is my bedroom. Pater calls it the Pepto-Bismol room. What's Pepto-Bismol?

Pater took my advice and made sure my shoe collection had its own home.

I love my bedroom. It's where I sleep with my doggies. It's where Mater and Pater read to me in my rocking chair. It's where Mater changes my dirty diapers and picks out what clothes I'm going to wear. And it's where I play at the end of a long day, um, playing.

Enough of me playing in my room. Let's go downstairs to the basement. Mater doesn't let me climb down stairs, so can someone please carry me? Great. And here's me playing in my basement with Mr Boing Boing my toy rabbit, and taking him shopping...

Now onto the garden. What's that noise? Alert. Alert. Drat, Mater and Pater have found me. I'll have to finish the post later tonight, once they've gone to bed. Quick, got to slip the notebook back into my diaper...

...okay, it's me again, lying in my cot at the end of a long day. Earlier was a close call but Mater and Pater didn't suspect a thing. After some supper and a bit more playing, Mater insisted on bathing me. I know, ridiculous - I bathed just yesterday! What's that all about? Mothers! I guess it's not too bad now that I get a whole bathtub to myself. Hair washes aren't too much fun because my hair is so long...

...but with all my toys and a big bath to play in, I can't complain.

Doggy has just informed me that I'm keeping him up with my typing so I'd better finish off. I hope you all enjoyed your tour of my new house. Feel free to drop by any time. With or without a gift for me...

Mater: It's my party and I'll break out in hives if I want to

Posted by Mater , Thursday, November 4, 2010 9:58 PM

Everything started out just fine. Your typical 1 year old birthday party. With cake and decorations and presents and family and food and balloons and a birthday crown, of course.

And then things started getting a little wild when the clothing started to come off. Avocado Jr., you do have some great thigh rolls, so everyone welcomed the nudity.

Pater: International jet setter

Posted by Mater , Saturday, October 23, 2010 9:15 PM

How better to celebrate your first birthday, Avocado Jnr, than a holiday in not just one country but two! Your trip to England and Israel was jam packed from start to finish with family, friends and lots of travelling. Lots. There was a ton of food, oodles of sun and a hint of jet lag. And through it all you were as cute as a button. Actually, cuter.

Unfortunately you started the holiday feeling under the weather - notably when you were above the weather, but Pater's getting ahead of himself. Like any jet setter you were fully prepared for the flight from Toronto to London...

Correct apparel?

Check! Suitcase packed?Check! At the airport?
Check! Seatbelt buckled up and ready to fly?

Check!

After a wonderful seven hour where you fell asleep for the duration of the flight, leaving Mater and Pater to watch movies and laugh in a carefree manner, we arrived fresh and ready for London. And then Pater woke up from his sorely needed shut-eye, snatched after you finally succumbed to overtiredness, lullabies and enough drugs to put out a hippo. Did I mention that you slept for a total of twenty minutes over a long, overnight flight of seven hours? Twenty minutes. Overnight. Seven hours.

But enough about that. On with the trip.

London was a whirlwind event and in the course of forty hours you met Pater's English friends (no, we don't call them British friends; Britain means England and Scotland, and Pater has no Scottish friends), hung out at Grandma London's apartment...

...spent quality time with Grandpa London...
...flirted with some English dudes (Canadian toddlers watch out)...
...and ate out and shopped (or at least, waited with Grandma London while Mater shopped)...
And then it was back on the plane for a shorter flight (just) to Israel. Mater and Pater used every trick in the book to keep you distracted and amused...

Before you escaped, Mater plopped you onto Pater's knee and gave you a roll to eat. Who knew a roll was made up of so many breadcrumbs? And then God smiled down on the Hass Avocados. One minute you were chatting up a little boy in the seat next to you (who was not put off by the unladylike way you were demolishing the roll) and the next you had passed out. And slept for two hours. Finally, Mater and Pater could watch a movie (Get Him to The Greek).

And then at 4am local time, or 2am London time, or 10pm Toronto time (ah jet lag) we arrived in the Holy Land.We picked up a car, left Ben Gurion Airport and an hour later were relieved to see this...
After navigating the narrow roads of Jerusalem, we found the apartment we would be staying in for the next 12 days. There was a great view of the Israeli Parliament (Knesset)... ...but you had other things to distract you...

A relaxing holiday this wasn't. But that didn't stop you having fun. You cracked up at our favourite cafe... You swam with Pater and both your grandmas, enjoying yourself both in the pool...

...and out...

Your love of animals meant we had to take you to Jerusalem's amazing zoo, where your hairstyle put the cockatoos to shame...

You saw some great animals there and, dare Pater say it, seemed to like it better than Toronto Zoo (we apologise to all Torontonians for this obvious heresy).

You were exposed to a ton of culture both new, at the Israel Museum......

and old, at the Western Wall where one of your Cousin Torontos did a great job reading from the Torah...

And of course you met your Uncle and Aunty Tel Aviv and played with your Israelis cousins both in their home...

...and at the beach...

Truth is, the trip was taken for several reasons. To celebrate your cousin's Bar Mitzvah. To meet Grandpa London. To meet Uncle and Aunty Tel Aviv and your Israelis cousins. To spend time with Grandma Toronto and Grandma London. To meet Pater and Mater's friends in England and Israel. To show you where Pater came from and where Mater and Pater spent their first year of marriage. To feel real warmth before the harsh Canadian winter. To top up Pater's tan. So that Mater could shop. The list goes on. And you were so well behaved throughout despite being unwell, despite the jet lag, despite the heat wave, despite being shlepped from pillar to post. You smiled and laughed and clapped and showed your array of tricks to everyone you met. And now everyone who matters in England and Israel love you as much as we in Toronto do!

Finally, a big shout out to everyone who got you gifts. Thank you for: The stacking cups (you drink bath water out of them despite Pater's attempts to stop you). The knitted blanket (which may just protect you from the harsh Canadian winters). The uber cute clothes and doll (who you love karate throwing over your shoulder at every opportunity). The bubbles and bath toys (hard foam fish, everyone of which you chew and taste EVERY bathtime). And the toy radio (which Pater hopes will teach you an English accent). Cheers from Avocado Jnr!!!