Hasses aren't only avocados.

Mater: A True Canadian

Posted by Pater , Monday, March 24, 2014 9:20 PM

Grandma Toronto was born in Hungary, Grandpa Toronto was born in America, Grandma London was born in South Africa and Grandpa London was born in Poland.  Pater was born in England.  Sooooo that pretty much leaves it to Mater, the only true-born Canadian, to teach you both about being a Canadian.  My Avocado Juniors, this means it is up to Mater to explain the importance of "ai" at the end of every sentence.  Alreet, not alright.  Ooot, not out. Labour, not labor.  Oh and if you want to get ahead in this country, you need to know everything and anything about hockey. 

We're not talking about a fleeting acquaintance with Canada's favourite sport. Encyclopaedic knowledge is required of the Toronto Maple Leafs, Montreal Canadiens and Ottawa Senators if you are to avoid pariah status in the playground or at the water cooler.  But knowledge is not enough.  Oh no.  You also need to know how to play the game and so your first step on this path to social inclusion is learning to skate.  Which you did like a true pro, AJ1, this winter, going from this...

...in just a short time, to this...

Next year you'll be skating rings around AJ2 when he joins you on the ice.  Not to mention Pater who WILL be donning skates despite what he says.  And no, Pater, it's not enough for you to read Stephen Harper's "A Great Game" from cover to cover!